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Monday, June 30, 2008

Taking Jesus to the BUSH, BUSH!

I went on an evangelistic outreach last weekend in the bush, bush. (The reason that they call it the bush, bush is because it is really out in the middle of nowhere.) There are only grass huts, no electricity, and no running water. There were many people in this area who were starving, malnourished, and extremely impoverished. My heart was deeply burdened and broken as I witnessed the needs in this village.

This outreach experience was a very exciting trip! I saw God work in amazing ways during the three days that we were gone. It was also wonderful to see God take all that the enemy intended for harm and use it for good.

One of these situations happened about twenty minutes after we left the IRIS base. We had almost 30 people crowded in the back of our truck, so we blew out a tire as we were driving down the road. (Praise God that it was not one of the main tires, so it didn't cause an accident!)

The first place that we stopped to get the tire fixed temporarily was a small village. While we were waiting for the tire to get fixed, we began praying for people to get healed. There was a lady who had a knee and back problem. We prayed for her, and she got healed. She also did not know Jesus. We shared God's love with her, and she accepted Christ into her heart. You could see the joy in her face as she moved her leg freely. Then another lady came who could not see clearly out of her one eye. We prayed for her, and her vision improved. A third lady had a problem with her kidneys. After we prayed for her, she told us that she felt better than she had been feeling. We believe God for total recovery in the near future.

We had to stop at a second place to fix the tire properly. This time a quadriplegic was brought to us for prayer. We all prayed for him very intensely. As we were praying, we did not see him healed, but I do believe that God's love was made real to him that day. While I was praying, God laid it on my heart to wash this man's feet. One of the Mozambican interpreters helped pour water on his feet while I washed. This was a very sacred moment for me. It really touched my heart. I prayed and wept as I washed his feet. I was very thankful that I was given the opportunity to show God's love to this man. When we left, the man thanked me for washing his feet, and he had a smile on his face.

One of the things that I have found to be very difficult in praying for healing is that if their illness isn't cured, I feel as though I have not given them anything.

However, on this trip, God has been showing me that healing in the heart is just as important as physical healing. Everyone needs to be touched by God's love, and God's love is a gift that I can always give to the sick. I can always give them a taste of Jesus and his love.

When we arrived at our destination, we were able to have a service that night for the people of the village. We shared the gospel message through a drama and testimonies. Then one of the IRIS people preached a sermon. There was an altar call at the end of the service. We prayed for people to receive Jesus and also prayed for the sick.

I was able to pray for many people. Most of the people that I prayed for seemed to have headaches or stomach pain. I didn't always have a translator, so sometimes I had to guess about what the problem was by where they pointed on their bodies. Almost all of the people told the translator that they felt better or gave me some hand signal to say that they were feeling better after I prayed for them.

I must share that this was the first time that I have really engaged in healing ministry, but I can say that I truly did feel the power of God upon me as I prayed for people. I have never experienced anything like this. This weekend I was able to see three people walk, who had not walked for a long time. It was an amazing experience for me. I was filled with joy as I continued to pray for people. I also saw many people be filled with joy in their hearts. I belive that God's love touched people's hearts and that they experienced inner healings as well.

The second day I was able to pray for more people and lead 4 people to Christ who had never heard about Jesus. There was also a baptismal service for the people who got saved the night before.

I will end this blog with two stories that touched my heart the most. The first one is about a lady named Julietta. She was an elderly lady that was extremely malnourished. You could clearly see her bones through her body, and she had tattered clothes. My heart was deeply moved as I looked at her. I asked the interpreter if he would ask Julietta if I could pray for her. She said that I could. I sat down in the dirt with her and began to pray for her. I then asked the interpreter to ask her if she knew Jesus. She said that she didn't know about him, but she would love for me to tell her about him. I shared about Jesus and what he had done for my life. Then I asked her if she wanted to ask Jesus into her heart. She said. "Yes." After I finished praying for her, she told the translator that she was very sad before I came and prayed, but now she was very happy. I could tell from her facial expressions that a change had truly taken place. She also told the translator that she knew that Jesus was here. I was so touched that I began to cry tears of joy. This experience blessed my life immensely! I give all glory and honor to God for his faithful love and compassion. It is a beautiful thing to see the love of Jesus bringing hope to the despairing. During on final service the next day, I danced with Julietta. It was such a joyful experience. We laughed throughout the whole experience. (The Africans always laugh at me when I dance with them. I am going to try to get one of the Africans to give me dance lessons so I can improve my dancing skills.)

The last story I want to tell is about an infant that I prayed for. I was not sure what was wrong with her, but I knew that she was very sick. I could feel that she had a fever, and her mother pointed to the baby's head and stomach. I began to pray for her. I sensed that I should ask the mother to hold the child in my arms. I found an interpreter to ask the mother if it was fine for me to do this. The mother agreed. I held the little baby in my arms and prayed fervently for her. I imagined that it was Jesus who was holding her and continued to pray for healing. I rocked her in my arms for about five minutes as I prayed. Then I felt her forehead. Her fever was completely gone! I was so excited that I shouted for joy. Then I gave her back to her mother. Her mother was also very happy!

I praise God for being so good and faithful. He is truly an awesome God!

The final thing that I want to share about this outreach is that I had another opportunity to experience the compassion of God's heart. As I looked into the people's eyes and touched them and hugged them, my heart broke so many times. I continued to pray that I would look at them with Jesus' eyes of love and compassion. I believe that God answered this prayer because even now I still can remember the desperation in their faces and my heart hurts for the great needs that so many of them have. I pray that God will continue to send people to come and help those who are needy and have little hope (both pysically and spiritually). There are needy people all around us, but we have to let Jesus' love and compassion capture our hearts so that we are compelled to bring life to others and to search for the treasures that exist in the darkness.

I have personally been challenged to keep opening up my heart to Jesus so that his love will abudnantly pour out of my life.

Beauty in Brokenness

Beauty and broken are two words that do not seem to belong together-especially in a world that focuses on fixing impurities and covering imperfections. Our society has trained us to reject the imperfect or incomplete and always fix what is broken. As a perfectionist, I personally have struggled to attain a high standard of excellence and have applied much pressure on myself to be strong and without flaw. Yet, God continues to challenge the mindsets that have bound me for so long. This process began a few years ago, but continues to intensify, especially now that I am in Pemba.

In fact, one morning as I was walking along the beach, God vividly spoke to me about the beauty that exists in brokenness. As I was praying and walking along the beach, my foot kicked something in the sand. I knelt down to look at what I had kicked. When I picked up the object, I saw a brightly colored seashell. The colors were so exquisite that I determined that it was the most beautiful seashell that I had ever seen. Yet, I also noticed that the shell was broken and part of it was missing. I thought to myself, "I don't want to keep this shell because it is broken. I want to keep a shell that is whole," so I threw it back in the sand.

A few minutes later, as my friend and I were walking back to the base, my friend showed me a shell that she had found. She asked me, "Isn't it beautiful?" "Yes, it is." I replied. Then I said, "I also found one that was very beautiful, but it was broken."

The moment that these words came out of my mouth I began to weep uncontrollably. Immediately God quickened my heart and spirit and spoke to me about the beauty that he sees in my brokenness. It was as though he was saying to me, "I see your brokenness, but I also see immense beauty. I delight in your brokenness."

God used this small object lesson to reiterate a key principle about the kingdom of God. It says in Psalm 51:17, "The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise."

So many times we look at our lives and think we need to fix up ourselves in order for God to use us. We think that our flaws and weaknesses will prevent God from completing his work in and through our lives. We keep our eyes on our inadequacies; instead of focusing on Jesus.

However, God does not focus on our weaknesses. At the moments that we are the weakest, he is the strongest. He wants us to come before him as we are and ask him to help us. He doesn't want people who find strength in themselves. He wants people who will die to themselves and fully rely on his strength. As we present our broken selves before him, he can then complete us and make us whole-only then can his love and power flow freely through us.

God has continued to remind me that I can do nothing without him. Everyday I need to ask him to empower me, strengthen me, and give me more wisdom and love. It is out of my brokenness that the true beauty of Jesus can shine brightly. He receives all of the glory for everything that I do because I know that without him I could never act, love, and serve others the way that I should.

God wants me to need him so desperately that I do nothing on my own strength. If I don't see myself as broken-always needing him to make me complete-I will not be an image bearer of Jesus. I pray that my heart and life will always be soft and broken before the Lord. I pray that I will always see that I am in desperate need of Jesus. Jesus is the only one who can make me whole. Lord, give me a humble and contrite heart, and "may I go lower still"-as Heidi says so many times when she preaches.

Since I have arrived in Pemba, one of the scriptures that Heidi continues to emphasize is the beatitude: Blessed are the Poor in Spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of Heaven. She has been talking to us about developing the attitude that we are poor in ourselves and that we desperately need Jesus to help us. She told us that her experiences with the poor taught her invaluable lessons about true Christianity. One of these lessons was the following: As it is with the poor, unless we are fed by the word and presence of God, we will die.

As I was feeding thousands of hungry people this weekend, I could see the desperation and longing for food in their faces. I was challenged to ask myself, "Do I have that kind of intense hunger for more of Jesus? Does my heart reflect desperation for more the bread of life and living water that Jesus has to offer me?" I sincerely pray that it does and always will.

I also pray that Jesus will give each one of us a burning hunger for more of him.

Amen

Saturday, June 7, 2008

First Week in Mozambique

I have spent one week in Mozambique now. It is very beautiful here-in more ways than one. IRIS Ministries is located directly across from Pemba beach. The ocean is gorgeous. Nevertheless, you still find differences from American beaches. You cannot just sit on the beach in the afternoon and pray and think because at least one African man is going to sit down and talk to you. (When you are white, privacy is very difficult to find in Africa!)

Yet, the beach is not the most beautiful thing that I find here. The loveliest part of my experience here has been the refreshing presence of God. My heart has been so deeply moved as God sings over me each day. My prayer is that my hunger and desire for more of God is never quenched. The beautiful thing about God’s presence is-The more we experience, the more we long to experience it. The burning desire of my heart is for God to love on me and for me to love on Him. I know that the only way to find true joy and satisfaction is to be fully satisfied in God. I also know that I will only love others with God’s love as God fills me with his love. I am continually challenged with this thought, “What would Jesus do at this moment to show God’s love to a lost and dying world?” I pray that God fills me with his love so that each moment I love as Jesus would love.

I have been attending classes every day until 1:00. Heidi Baker has instructed us twice since I have been here. She truly is an amazing woman. I am so blessed to be here. It is an honor and privilege to study under her. I know that I am going to learn so much from her.

God has continually been speaking to my heart since I have arrived. I find that he again is challenging my heart and my perspectives on life.